Good Bye 2015 and Good Riddance

Two thousand and sixteen is here, a new year full of potential and upcoming growth. What will it bring? None of us know really, we have plans and intentions, resolutions so to speak. How many times have we let those go and sat in disappointment? Do not decide today what tomorrow will hold, I challenge you as I challenge myself, let 2016 take you where it may, let its failures make you grow, take each day as a chance for a new adventure. I am calling 2016 the Water Year.  Drink the water, Be the water, Feel the water, Jump into the water, but do not try to hold on to the water. Water is meant for movement and change, allow it to happen.

Oh, two thousand fifteen, how you had the potential to be great. I know for certain that 2015 was a year of growth for me. I would label it as a terrible year, but I can’t really do that, too much forward motion happened in my life. – I got a job in my desired field. -Attended an Art Conference. -Moved for the job to a new place. -Committed to Essential Oils and got off my SSRIs. -Got to see family and friends throughout the year. – Saw my Love begin his journey by going to school to pursue a dream.

Water-Image1.jpgSo, there has been a lot of movement. A lot of newness, awakening. With this newness I at the close of this year have made some realizations.

About myself:

1)I am a one track minded person. I make a goal and that takes over my life so that there is not room for any other goals to be pursued at the same time. This has become very apparent since beginning my new job. They like for everyone to have 300 things going on at one time….nah thanks though.

2)I am horrible with money, but not as bad as I used to be. This year has definitely been a money spending year. I would love to have had more money saved, but then again I didn’t go into debt either!

3)I am slowly becoming a hermit. I have seen a change in the amount of me-time I need since being surrounded by hundreds of people daily.

4)I am a very negative person. While I hate to admit this, I know it is true because I hear the things that come out of my mouth daily.

About other people:

1)Friends are hard to come by. This year has been very telling with the move mainly, I have seen both friends and family fall away. While this has been very difficult, It is to be expected in this age of technology where a text message is considered a real connection. Also, making new friends in a town where you have nothing in common with anyone is an almost futile task.

2)Just because one person does something one way does not mean you have to do it the same. This seems obvious, but in teaching everyone has their own way of doing it.

3)Some people are just in your life when it’s convenient for them. This has been had to accept, but when you realize who they are you need to say goodbye. this is a TOXIC relationship.

4) Most people are not real enough with themselves to be real with you.

So let’s not rehash the past, but move on the to future. Wash away the past so 2016 may be the year of pure pure water.

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Goodbye SSRIs, Hello Essential Oils

So, as many people know or don’t, I began my journey with Young Living Essential Oils with one goal in mind. Freedom from Prescriptions, specifically the nasty little SSRIs I have had to take for the past 13 years. I have had all different flavors, Zoloft, Paxil (ekk), Du something something, one that started with a B, throw a Xanax in ever so often and the most recent Cymbalta. There are a load of different side effects for each one, but it was very much a necessary evil in my life. See I don’t have what is considered occasional anxiety, I have the everyday Manic Depressive sorta cuckoo variety. Well, I have never really cared the feeling of being a robot and always have been concerned about the long term effects of giving myself daily chemicals. So my switch to essential oils began. Now here I am going to tell you that you should not get off any prescription without consulting a doctor and YL does not advertise/recommend/take any responsibility for you replacing medication using their essential oils. NOW. I did not consult my doctor, but I also know my own body and I waited for a weekend because I envisioned there would be some sort of detox when making the switch. There was, the worst was day two, I was very loopy and extremely emotional. Thankfully I was at home, and with a person who loves me.  Since then I have worked out a few kinks, so to speak in the oils I use. I apply all my oils in the morning when I wake up and I added an oil that I use when I get off work . I both scenarios I wait about 20 minutes for the to take effect, you can feel the difference.  Because I have had many requests to list what I use for my anxiety/depression I made a hand chart.

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The as needed oils are ones that I keep on hand for when I am having a particularly stressful day and/or need to relax. I use Peace and Calming when I am having a hard time sleeping and Stress Away anytime(I keep it in my purse). Everyone’s body is different and you know what your body needs the best. I am happy that I made the switch and am confident with my decision.

Everyday is a new day and some days you just need to be a little oilier than others!

Now, I use other oils for my day to day life, headaches, sinus issues, cleaning, that’s why I love having my starter kit(and the 24% off) But I wanted this blog to solely focus on why I got into sharing and using YL Essential oils.

Please message, comment or contact me if you have any other questions! I have no problems talking about my depression or experience.

Modern Root-Sarah Douglas-#3190313 Order your Oils!

TAEA Conference 2015

A week and a half ago I went to my first ever Art Education Conference. The experience was enlightening and engaging, plus whatever E word you can think of. I had a fantastic time, left my class in the hands of a sub for two days, and stuffed my brain with art edumacating goodness. I was with my people, I revaluated what I wanted my classroom to look like/feel like. I got to experiment with art materials and negotiate with myself over how many Art teacher t-shirts is too many to purchase on this trip.

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I had such a great time. The one regret I have though is not getting a Friday the 13th paintbrush tattoo.(Apparently a bunch of the art teachers did and they were uber cute)

Life Lately, Rothko Style

Hello there, How has life been lately? Good, busy, and tiring. November is almost here, which mean for most Texas Art Teachers that rodeo art is fixing to be in full swing! Ekkkk. that’s the really scary thing about Halloween! Which brings me to this post about today. Because of how busy I am most of the time we have turned into homebodies. Ok, I have, Pat has always identified as one. So We went on a little excursion today and I thought I would tell you about it!

Today was the day that any qualifying Texas school who didn’t have the budget to buy mat board for rodeo art could pick up some Free mat board. Well with my baby budget I definitely qualified and trucked my butt all the way into Houston to get some! (I took Pat too since he is the only one who knows how to adequately paddle a canoe and it was supposed to monsoon rain.) I will let you know, they did not have a giant sign saying “Hey Teachers, Free Mat Board Here”. No, they had a tiny sign taped to a tiny door in a giiiiiiiinormous NRG center. We did find it eventually and it was fantastically free. So we were already in Houston and we decided to make a rainy good day of it. We ate at a yummy little Vegetarian friendly restaurant called Field of Greens. (definitely going back there) Then we went to the MFAH to see the Mark Rothko retrospective! I had been dying to see it and was uber excited!

Image-1 I had a fantastic time. I think I enjoyed it even more since my 2nd graders just finished their Rothko Pastel Paintings on Friday! I talked way too much to Pat about the art (he hates that), but what can I say……Art Teacher 4 eva.

Oh, here is a completely unedited photo I got of Patrick in deep concentration looking at an artwork, can’t you tell he is really feeling the emotion of the piece? Me too!

Image-1 (1)Some things we do for money, some we do for love, love, love.  – The Mountain Goats

Quick Update: School Dazeeee all oiled up.

Hello, again! It seems like I never blog, but here I am again. I have some life updates/chatter to talk about so I thought I would come here and spill.

Now is as good as time as ever to sort of apologize for being an over emotional blogger on my last post HERE. I was actually on the third day of completely detoxing off of my anti-anxiety/depression medication that I have taken since I was 12 years old. It was by far one of the hardest days I have had in YEARS. I can not lie about that. BUT. It has completely been worth it.

If you have read any of my blog posts you know I talk a lot about my clinical depression. I am for realsss crazy, but I am also a person who : A) doesn’t like the idea of putting harmful chemicals into her body if she has an option. B) doesn’t like the sigma attached to anyone with a diagnosed mental illness. So even though two years ago when someone I knew told me about using YL essential oils to treat their depression, I was a skeptic, but intrigued.It would be a cheaper and healthier alternative in the long run, but the initial investment would not be comfortably covered by insurance. So I waited. and waited.

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I ordered the oils and when I got them in, I ditched my meds and swapped right over to Oils. That was September 17th. Yes, I realize easing off of the medication would have been the doctor prescribed way of doing things, but I was ready to take the leap.

Since receiving my oils I have felt relatively the normal, meaning the cloud of SSRIs has slowly faded, but I have noticed that that occasionally I need a few drops of oils on the crazier days. It is a work in progress, but I feel more confident in the decisions to make better choices for my body and thus my future. I also received my AMAZING Young Living starter kit and fell in love instantly. I have used it for headaches, snoring, cleaning the air, calming my classroom, cold symptoms, a sleep aid and am learning everyday new ways to use it more. I have become very serious about spreading the word about the miracles these oils do and can do for your life!

Which brings me to my next announcement! I have become a distributor of Young Living 100% Therapeutic Grade essential oils. I have titled my venture : Modern Root. I am making myself available to answer questions, share products and discuss uses. I would love to talk to you about anything you are going through and potential find your natural oily solution!blogpostimage

If you are interested in seeing for yourself you can sign up here:I’m Ready!

FYI: Young Living does not EVER tell you to replace your medication with Essential Oils. I am sure that would be an big lawsuit by the FDA. That being said you can read various peoples testimonies who took the chance and were healed of serious ailments using 100% therapeutic grade oils.

When will your truth be true?

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I knew I shouldn’t have went to church today, I felt it. I went anyway. Now don’t get me wrong, I enjoyed meeting the Cambodian girls my church brought to America for training, I loved their desire to better their lives and country for Jesus. This just reminded me how much I would love to go overseas someday on a mission, how I have always felt that calling, how I have always Jonahed my way out of that commitment…but that’s another blog in itself.

I went to Church anyway, sat there awkwardly, listened, opened my heart. The message began, it seemed hopeful initially. Then I realized what message it was, that message I have heard millions of times at 20 different churches, all with their different flavors added to it. You know the one, the give your pain to Christ he will carry your burden. Pain is in your life for a reason, it makes you closer to Christ, it makes you appreciate and depend on Christ. The believe and have faith and God will ease your pain You know this message, the apparently all knowing Matt Walsh knows this message and though your pastor has changed the words some, he has preached this message a million times. It generally ends with an altar call, and/or some individual prayer, standing, singing, wonderful relief.tumblr_niaj1ff4VO1qdqv28o1_1280

Ok…..So what’s the problem with hearing a message more than once? Nothing, but this particular message boils my blood, Like not a little, like angry cry, pitch a fit, throw things. Yes, I am well aware that this type of anger is generally not found in Church, but to me this message highlights one of the largest holes in the modern church. This is a message for the 99%, I get it. It works for those 99%. The give your pain away, its that simple method. Or the accept that you were given pain to learn from it, to better understand Christ’s suffering. I am not saying that the Church is not telling the truth, they are, but if it is not the whole truth  than should the partial truth be said at all. If you can not help the 1%, give the 1% a solution that actually works for them than should it be said at all.

I am the 1%. I have a mental illness. I do fully accept that God can take it away from me when he want to. I have tried these methods. I was once even told that maybe I just hadn’t had the right person pray over me, yet. I am well past giving my PAIN to God, pastor. I have given it to God, with tears, gift wrapped it, with praise, in anger, happiness, and thrown it at Him. I have been anything but unwilling to let my illness go. I have went to the altar, I have had quite a few hands laid on my back, head, etc. I also did the super evangelical revival style of letting my burden go, you know the prayer on the head fall on the floor business. I have not had an exorcism, but honestly I am waiting to hear someone suggest it. So, yeah, I have tried it. This is why this message angers me, it never has worked for me, and I understand pain quite a bit more than that one time you got into a car wreck and thought you were paralyzed. Yeah, I get it, You were scared, you hoped you would die so you wouldn’t be a burden, Been there, done that. Yeah, your nerves hurt you ever once in a while, you have had to have surgery. At least there was some medical relief for you….The medical relief for me just turns me into a walking zombie. Anywayyyysssss, I get you, your pain was/is bad.

Hey Church, don’t preach this message until you have the answer for the rest of us. Us one percent are not feeling this Peace that you speak of at the end of the service. (yeah, we felt it one time, until we walked outside and realized our burden was super glued to our back.)  We feel angry and betrayed, by you, by this God you speak of that is picking up everyone else’s burden’s like they were candy in a Mardi Gras parade. Our burden’s aren’t being picked last pastor man, they aren’t being picked at all. So give us a solution, tell us why we have to keep our burden? No answer? Than maybe you need to reevaluate if your truth is the whole truth, if you should open your mouth at all. We need a new solution, we need a Peter speaking and my disease is gone. That is the solution we need. That is the pastor we need. If your Word is not on that level, than why is anyone accepting it as the Truth you are speaking.. Don’t actions speak louder than words?  I don’t want your watered-down rerecorded message, I want you to speak REAL HEALING. You need fire in your words, you need absolute truth.

Thus says the LORD of hosts, “Do not listen to the words of the prophets who are prophesying to you. They are leading you into futility; They speak a vision of their own imagination, Not from the mouth of the LORD. Jeremiah 23:16

Charcoal for Kids=A mess to be made

Hey guys, even though I am a terrible blogger I have discovered that I am so far a semi ok art teacher. Any who, no one has died and we have almost completed 800+ teacher superhero drawings. So I am letting you know that I have started a little Donorschoose site to fund getting a class set of drawing boards and charcoal for my sweet students.

If you want to take a look click HERE. It would be fantastic for the, and allow us to go outside ever so often. ALSO! If you donate sometime during the next eek and use the code: SPARK, they will match your donation!

I will write later, thanks everyone!

Anxiety Post 3 – The Start Of School

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I am terrible at writing blogs regularly or on ay schedule whatsoever, I know I am not good at it, but I have accepted it and moved on. I will write blogs when I feel I need to, when I want to make some sort of verbal announcement of how I am feeling, just so I can put it into words. So, why today? Why would I want to write a post after I spent all day sweating and am nursing what feels like a sore throat/voice disappearing scratchiness. Well, Today is one of those days that I actually feel proud of myself.

If you suffer from depression or anxiety, maybe both than you know what a victory this is. That’s one of the things this disease takes from you, the ability to be happy or proud of yourself.

Today was my first day of teaching, in my own actual classroom, with my own actual students, in a room that I actually put many hours and many worries into. And honestly, Today was average good, As in, stuff went wrong, the day was bumpy, I saw areas I already know I need to improve one, it was 80 degrees all day in the art room. But. Yes, But. I am so very proud of myself. I planned, I worked, and I made it, I can do this. Moments where I actually feel this way and am not dwelling in self doubt do not happen often in my life/mind, so I am celebrating this victory. I am grateful to everyone who helped get me here, who sacrificed, who comforted my anxieties. I will move on, I will be victorious because Christ is in me and worry will not win.

Welcome to Mrs. Douglas’ Art Room!

I love how my room turned out so bright and colorful! I feel it truly shows my personality.

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Ok, so I am here sharing photos of my finished classroom because quiet a few people have wanted to see them. Well, basically finished, except for a few things that need to be laminated before they are hung. There is a lot of planning that has went into where everything is in the classroom and various procedures, so it feels good to have my classroom student ready. I was blessed with an abundance of supplies, but I had to physically put my hands on all of them so I knew where they were, (plus reorganize everything)

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The biggest improvement was the amount of space the room actually had when everything was organized and I got rid of the extra computer desk, which was unnecessary and organized everything. Now, I know there is a lot to look at, so if you have any questions about what a certain thing is or how I plan on using it, please ask. I really didn’t want any of the room to be wasted space. There ended up being a few areas like that , but luckily they are minimal.

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I found many of the signs either online, or I made them to fit the space. I really wanted the whole room to feel finished, but I also didn’t want it to still feel like the previous teachers room, I wanted it to feel like my room! I feel good about the adventure I am about to embark on this year and am happy to be in the space I am!

Now I think I am going to head out to this legendary Lakeshore Learning store to spend money I haven’t made yet!