Well, the New Year is here. It has been a day or two and surely there are some of you that have already started to tackle your New Year resolutions. Lose weight… be more sociable… be on Facebook less… Call mom more often… the list just seems endless.
I am actually one of the many, however, that has not really ever done a resolution for the New Year. And this post isn’t about me starting one either. But, I will say that the idea of a resolution is what started my train of thoughts that inspired this blog post. With the New Year upon us I started thinking on the resolutions people would be making. With that, I thought about myself. Was there anything I would like to change about myself? Upon reflection I went way back in time to when I first became a Christian more than 10 years ago. And in the 10 years that have passed I have met, made, and lost a lot of relationships (various reasons, but mostly a result of moving to new locations and being away from home so often).
When I think about these relationships I can’t help but reflect on them all. And what I see when I look back on them is terrible. I think that I am quite possibly the worst Christian you will ever meet. If you are ready for my rant, then here goes. Satanism is the worship of self. With that in mind, to be self centered is the opposite of Christ. When I look back on 10 years of relationships… people I dated, people I was in a band with, friends, family, fellow believers, co-workers… and so on, all I can see is how focused I was on just myself. My mindset was always “how can this person help ME”. Rather than, “how can I help this person”. I wasn’t in a band with these people because we were best friends. I was in a band with them because they were pushing me toward my goal of a music career. When I broke up with her it was because it was not longer convenient to date anymore. And so on…
What am I getting at?
Well, I feel like I have been asleep. How often as Christians are we not consciously “Christian”? For 2017 I want to be a conscious Christian. Someone that actually focuses on the people around them rather than being so inside themselves that they pass every moment by being asleep. Here are some examples of what I mean.
At work a girl walks by wearing tight clothing and her shorts are way too short. My co-worker who happens to be standing with me addresses the girl to me in a derogatory manor. My response it silence. Most people might think I did the Christian thing there. I didn’t provoke the banter. But my stomach turns at this for one reason. I can’t help but ask myself why my co-worker didn’t respect my values by not pointing it out and saying nothing at all? Does this co-worker even know I am a Christian? Most likely not. There is something wrong with that picture. Why have I not made a conscious effort to see the opportunities to witness to them about my beliefs? I will tell you why… because I have been too focused on my “self” (satanism). My mind is cluttered with what “I” need to get done today or tomorrow. How “I” did on this test or that exam. How “I” am going to do this or that.
Another example is the same situation, but this time my co-worker knows I am a Christian. The girl walks by and I don’t realize my co-worker is there and watching me. I take a look at the girl’s too-short shorts. As a result my co-worker is self-justified because he thinks that since I have lust of the eyes that my faith in invalid and grins to himself. In that case, why wasn’t I conscious that my co-worker was watching to see how I as a Christian would react to the visual stimulus? Not only did I sin in that moment, but I set a bad example at the same time justifying another man’s reasons to deny Christ. As Christians we are watched in this way by nonbelievers constantly. With that, why was I not a conscious Christian? If Christ is coming at any moment, then every moment matters.
What am I saying with all of this?
I feel that as Christians in a social media drive society we have become stagnant. Rather than go the extra mile by making a difference in our community we simply click “LIKE” on a post about poverty as if that justifies our lack of effort. We have fallen in line with the rest of the world. The Christians have fallen asleep, myself included. And quite honestly I am tired of it.
My resolution for 2017 is to become a conscious Christian by making every relationship count through focusing on them rather than myself. To quit being silent about the things I am passionate about by becoming active.
Thanks God I am saved by faith through grace. Otherwise, I would be in trouble. I am the worst Christian I know.